The Notebook

“The path I’ve chosen has always been the right one, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

By the end of the novel, it has been revealed that Noah has been battling cancer, he has lost a child, and his wife has Alzheimer’s disease. But he seems free of regret and bitterness. He knows he always made the right choice, while remaining aware that this did not guarantee him or entitle him to a specific outcome.

“‘I knew you was tryin’ to forget. I just didn’t know what.’”

When Noah tells Gus about Allie, Gus laughs. He realizes why Noah works so hard and why he is always moving, or kayaking, or canoeing, or reading. Noah is trying to keep Allie out of his mind. He does not want to forget her, which is obvious given that he keeps her painting over his mantel. But she is constantly on his mind, and given the pain of his loss, this drives him to seek distraction.

“As far as he could tell, man had always been aggressive, always striving to dominate, trying to control the world and everything in it. The war in Europe and Japan proved that.”

Noah believes that he is drawn to the water out of instinct. He is grateful that this instinct harms no one. He is not cynical, but he is realistic about the inherent, instinctive darkness in men. Men, unless they are self-aware, will always seek to conquer and fight. They look for power unless they have something else to focus on.

“‘There’s a part of you that you keep closed off from everyone, including me. It’s as if I’m not the one you’re really with. Your mind is on someone else.’” 

When Noah’s two-year relationship with a woman ends, she tells him her perceptions of why he seems distant. She can sense that he has loved someone else he has never gotten over and whom he cannot forget. Because she knows she cannot compete with Allie’s ghost, the woman lets him go.

“He would listen intently to her hopes and dreams for the future and then promise to make it all come true.”

The teenage version of Noah gives more support to Allie’s goals and ambitions than any adults in her life ever will. His promises seem like the brash proclamations of youth, but by the end of the novel, it can be assume that he was committed to helping Allie with anything she needed, even as a teenage boy. She will not again experience such support until she returns to him.

“‘New Bern’s small, but it does teach you how to do the things that matter.’”

Noah reminds Allie that the things that truly matter can be found anywhere, even in a town as small as New Bern by demonstrating how to pick up a crab in way that prevents it from pinching him. The friction between his lower-class status and Allie’s aristocratic family is a major part of their initial separation, but moments like this help Allie see that living to fulfill her parents’ expectations is not what will give her a happy life.

“‘My parents didn’t think it was proper for someone like me to paint for a living. I just stopped after a while.’”

Allie’s parents come from a tradition where there are things that people of the upper class do not do. Painting, for example, is not seen as a respectable pursuit. It is frivolous and does not guarantee an income. The fact that Allie is passionate about it does not gain her parent’s approval. Eventually, their lack of support numbs her to the point where she gives up something that she loves.

“This was when the chasm began to close for Allie, the chasm she had erected in her life to separate the pain from the pleasure.”

After Noah tells Allie that she is an artist and always will be, Allie begins to understand why she had to come back to New Bern to see him, even if it is the last time. With Noah, she sees a potential future in which she is supported and encouraged, and in which there is more pleasure than pain. She will be able to indulge in whatever pursuits she wishes.

“She wanted something else, something different, something more. Passion and romance, perhaps, or maybe quiet conversations in candlelit rooms, or perhaps something as simple as not being second.”

Allie knows that Lon is a good man and will be a good husband and father. But she feels like an accessory to his life. He works long hours to earn prestige and money. The demands of his job—his true passion—make quiet evenings and small talk unrealistic because that time could be better spent furthering his career.

“If anyone had seen him, they would have seen what looked like an old man, someone who’d aged a lifetime in just a couple of hours. Someone bent over in his rocker with his face in his hands and tears in his eyes.” 

Despite his veneer of calm acceptance in Allie’s presence, Noah breaks down when she drives away after her first night back. He cannot bear the thought of losing her twice, even though he will not try to stop her from making her own decision. Their night together is wonderful, but it is also a new reminder of what he lost when she left.

“‘You’ve never been your own person. A life like that makes you empty inside, and you’re looking for someone who will magically fill that void. But no one can do that but you.’”

This is Allie’s response to Lon when he tells her that he is not ready for a steady relationship. Her words are what intrigue him to the point where he decides to commit to her and pursues her until she agrees to be with him. He sees the truth in her words, although Allie’s life would be happier if she was able to apply her advice to her own situation.

“It was almost as if she’d never stopped.”

The morning after her dinner with Noah, Allie visits an art gallery. Then she draws for two hours at the inn where she is staying. Her talent returns to her so quickly that it surprises her. The ease of the drawing, which is analogous to the ease she feel reentering her relationship with Noah, shows her that she never should have quit.

“‘We fell in love, despite our differences, and once we did, something rare and beautiful was created. For me, love like that has only happened once, and that’s why every minute we spent together has been seared in my memory. I’ll never forget a single moment of it.’”

When Noah tells Allie that he will never forget one second of their summer together, he does not yet know that she has not been with another man since him. She feels the same about him, and that is why every day they spend together has the potential to be their best day, a sentiment echoed elsewhere in the book.

“‘In time, the hurt began to fade and it was easier to just let it go. At least I thought it was. But in every boy I met in the next few years, I found myself looking for you, and when the feelings got too strong, I’d write you another letter. But I never sent them for fear of what I might find. By then, you’d gone on with your life and I didn’t want to think about you loving someone else. I wanted to remember us like we were that summer. I didn’t ever want to lose that.’”

Because Allie does not receive Noah’s letters, she assumes that he no longer wants to be in touch with her. She never stops wanting to reconnect, but there comes a point when the pain of letting go is less than the pain of hoping to have him again. She preserves a perfect memory of them, just as he does.

“The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected. Maybe they always have been and will be. Maybe we’ve lived a thousand lives before this one and in each of them we’ve found each other. And maybe each time, we’ve been forced apart for the same reasons. That means that this goodbye is both a goodbye for the past ten thousand years and a prelude to what will come.”

In this letter that Noah gives Allie when they say goodbye as teenagers, he says he thinks it is possible that they are always meant to find each other in another life, each time they are separated. This means that a painful goodbye is not a reason for despair, just a signal that the search for each other must begin again. In this way, he can remain optimistic even in the face of loss.

“‘You are the answer to every prayer I’ve offered. You are a song, a dream, a whisper, and I don’t know how I could have lived without you for as long as I have.’”

Noah has always seen Allie as both a living memory and a living poem. Now he also calls her an answer to his prayers. This is the first sign that Noah has ever prayed consistently, although his belief in God is mentioned throughout the book. No matter what problems he has faced, his words show that he always believes her to be the solution.

“‘Follow your heart.’”

As Allie’s mother leaves Noah’s house, Allie thinks she hears her say she should follow her heart. This is consistent with Anne telling Allie, in the same conversation, that she should do what is right for her and to think about what she really wants. What Allie wanted was never the priority for her parents—they wanted her to want what was appropriate for people like them. Anne now lends at least her tacit support to Allie’s feelings for Noah.

“‘You can’t live your life for other people. You’ve got to do what’s right for you, even if it hurts some people you love.’” 

Allie has made important decisions based on Lon’s desires and the wishes of her parents. The expectations of other people lead her to stop painting and to become engaged to a man she does not feel passionately about. When she realizes that Noah is what is best for her, she sees that living only for others can never make one truly happy.

“You showed me what it was like to care for another, and I am a better man because of it. I don’t want you to ever forget that.” 

As she prepares to talk to Lon, Allie reads the last letter Noah wrote to her. Rather than reproaching her for vanishing, he expresses gratitude and love. He will always be better for having met her, even if he cannot ever see her again. This letter gives her the courage to tell Lon that she cannot marry him. If Noah can show such unabashed devotion to her, even while thinking she deserted him, she can do the same for him.  

“It is a barren disease, as empty and lifeless as a desert. It is a thief of hearts and souls and memories.”

Noah describes Alzheimer’s disease as a cruel condition that robs people of their memories and identities. But it causes even more pain for the spouses and family members it leaves behind, as Allie’s husband and children are forced to watch her forget them, despite their lives together. Allie spends her final years in a state of almost complete confusion.

“It seems only the old are able to sit next to one another and still feel content. The young, brash and impatient, must always break the silence. It is a waste, for silence is pure.”

Noah views the purity of silence similarly to the purity of rain or creek water. But silence is a quality that can be better appreciated with age. The fact that he and Allie can sit together in companionable silence and not feel less alone for it is an illustration of their comfort with each other and with themselves.

“You’re a kind man with a loving heart. I hope I enjoyed you as much before as I do now.”

Even though her memories do not last more than a few hours, Allie can sense that Noah is a good man who loves her and who has loved her. Even in the few hours she has spent getting to know him (again) during their walk, she is drawn to him and feels no qualms about expressing her admiration of him.

“I’ve always loved you, Noah.”

The doctors have told Noah that it is impossible for a patient with Alzheimer’s to reacquire memories during the day. But Allie remembers him while they are having dinner together, despite it being the end of the day. She knows that she has always loved him and can recognize who he is. It is this moment, that makes Noah’s dedication to her the most worthwhile: He can often bring her back for a few moments, and those moments are always enough for him to balance out the pain of her forgetfulness.