The Female Brain

Sylvia told Brizendine that she wanted to divorce her husband, Robert, who was demanding and who visited only twice with questions about the household when she was in the hospital with an intestinal blockage. Sylvia was 54 and felt that she had been spending her adult life caring for self-absorbed others. She had spent 28 years as a stay-at-home wife and mother, denied the chance to work by Robert’s refusal to contribute to running the household. Brizendine states that the shift toward independence in menopausal women has been considered psychological, but she suggests that it has a neurological cause. Brizendine hypothesizes that an MRI scan of Sylvia’s brain would show her neurology was more stable. Menopause, typically occurring around 51.5 years of age, takes place a year after a female body’s last period and results in a hormonal shift of reduced estrogen and oxytocin. Sylvia wanted to help a wider range of people, and Brizendine relates Sylvia’s feelings to Oprah saying that people never arrive at a static adulthood but continue to transform throughout their lives. Female perimenopause, which begins in the early- to mid-forties, carries a 50-60% chance of symptoms of changing hormones, such as hot flashes, joint pain, and reduced libido—caused by estrogen withdrawal in the hypothalamus. Sylvia sought psychiatric care at age 47 because she was experiencing multiple mood symptoms. Brizendine prescribed an antidepressant and estrogen, which managed the symptoms. Other signs of perimenopause include shorter menstrual periods and cravings for carbs and sweets. Brizendine ignored her own symptoms of perimenopause for years, but eventually managed her symptoms with an antidepressant and estrogen, both of which influence brain function.

Marilyn and Steve went to Brizendine after Marilyn’s libido dropped significantly. Marilyn had low testosterone, so Brizendine prescribed testosterone, which increased Marilyn’s sex drive. Some women experience a higher sex drive after menopause, as they are no longer worried about birth control or their menstrual cycle. Once Sylvia’s menstrual cycle stopped, she no longer experienced PMS, and she no longer had the estrogen and oxytocin levels that primed her for caretaking, according to Brizendine. Sylvia enjoyed seeing her children when they came home for visits, but she told them to start taking care of themselves. Brizendine posits that the “mommy brain” unplugs when children move out, which allows mothers the mental capability of focusing on personal ambitions. Some mothers may have difficulty adjusting to the changing circumstances, and others may peacefully enjoy alone time with their husbands, like Lynn and Don. Sylvia chose to pursue higher education and began working in a mental health clinic part time. Maternal behavior, according to a study performed on rats, is driven by close physical contact, so Brizendine posits that Sylvia’s declining interest in her children was a result of less contact with them, along with her hormonal changes. Sylvia focused on the concept that teenage behavioral problems are rooted in early education, she resumed attending church services, and began painting again.

Sylvia and Robert attended couples therapy. Robert was upset that Sylvia was not performing her typical roles, like making dinner for him every night, and that she had embarrassed him at a social gathering by criticizing his investing knowledge. She decided to move out. In the past, Sylvia had avoided fighting with Robert, tolerated his verbal abuse, and took pride in letting him win arguments. Brizendine claims that Sylvia’s new combativeness was caused by menopause—“Her ratio of testosterone to estrogen was shifting, and her anger pathways were becoming more like a man’s” (193). Although Robert was experiencing changes, too, Sylvia’s changes were more significant. Wives who are unhappy with their husbands, Brizendine explains, may become unhappier after menopause. Sylvia’s daughter confronted Sylvia, saying Robert was worried and felt that Sylvia wasn’t the same woman he married. While the stereotype is that husbands leave their wives for younger women, 65% of divorces for those over 50 are initiated by females. Brizendine suggests menopause plays a role, but also acknowledges that this is often due to undesirable marriages. Brizendine advises individuals to examine their impulses to verify their feelings are “real, as opposed to hormone-induced” (194). Sylvia moved out and began dating, although she was frustrated with older men who wanted a financially stable partner to take care of them. Some aging women do not notice a significant change, like Marcia, who was unconcerned with her declining interest in caretaking. She experienced physical menopause symptoms and was prescribed estrogen, which brought back her caretaking proclivities. When Sylvia moved out, her mood improved, and she found fulfillment in her work. She assumed the improvement was a result of leaving Robert, but six months later she admitted to feeling lonely.

During and after menopause, female humans may benefit from careers or personal accomplishments. Studies have measured higher levels of self-acceptance and effective functioning in women in their fifties and sixties who have high career momentum. Another patient, Edith, was anxious that her husband would retire and become demanding. This is exactly what occurred: He started questioning her and implying that she should be taking care of household duties better. Brizendine tells many female patients who exhibit depression after their husbands retire to renegotiate their marriages. When taken shortly after the onset of menopause (whether natural or surgical), estrogen therapy has been shown to protect the brain, heart, and vascular system. However, at the time of the book’s publication, scientists had not yet reached a conclusion on whether or when to implement such hormone therapy.

Denise was independent while raising her children and was unprepared for the intense love she felt when she first became a grandmother. Brizendine, citing the work of Kristen Hawkes, suggests grandmothers played an important role in prehistoric society by contributing to the survival rates of their grandchildren. Many female members of hunter-gathering cultures survive past the average life expectancy of 40, remaining productive into their sixties. Widespread menopause is a recent cultural phenomenon, as the average female life expectancy in the early 20th century was 49. When Sylvia reconnected with Robert after two years, they apologized to each other and rebuilt their relationship. Brizendine suggests postmenopause is an exciting time. She explains that she wrote The Female Brain to share her knowledge and help others.