Something Like Home

“[Janet] thought I should feel grateful

for my aunt and my new school,

which she talks about like

it’s a forever thing,

a “positive” change.

Basically, adults know nothing.

Nothing nothing period.”

Laura feels frustrated that she has no control over her situation. Her ongoing resentment for Janet is well-defined, as they have contrasting ideals. This also shows the theme of Control and Resilience in Times of Change.

“I’m like a woodpecker.

Or a hummingbird.

A solo bird instead of part of a flock.

Being alone is normal.

Super normal.”

The bird similes are an important symbol. Laura identifies with a woodpecker or hummingbird because she feels so alone.

“Titi […]

who […]

I can’t imagine I’ll ever love.”

Laura has no family love for Silvia or meaningful connection to her. This low starting point gives Laura and Silvia room to grow their connection as niece and aunt.

“You look Puerto Rican,

she loves to tell me.

Don’t you wanna sound

Puerto Rican too?

And I just shrug because what else can I say?

Truth is, I don’t care what I look and sound like to her.

All I care about

is what I look and sound like to my mom.”

Silvia and Laura’s dialogue clearly explores the theme of identity. They assign differing significance to their Puerto Rican heritage, with Silvia thinking it’s a valuable identifier and Laura doubting it. Only later does Laura evaluate her viewpoint on their shared ethnicity.

“And it’s not that I don’t want to be

friends with him specifically,

it’s more that I don’t know

how I could have any friend right now,

how I could talk to someone daily

or hang out with them,

and not have them see

how much eve

Laura’s reluctance to friendship is based on her deep emotional chaos. Since she views her life as too messy, she denies Benson, an essential supporting character.

“I never realized dogs could be so soft

so cuddly—

I suddenly have a live stuffed animal

that’s warm and even snores a little,

making bedtime not as lonely

as it used to be before.”

These descriptions highlight how Sparrow is a symbol for The Healing Power of Animals. The word choice, from “soft” to “warm” and “cuddly,” has positive associations, which underscore his importance to Laura’s healing.

“It’s confusing,

living this borrowed life.

Like I’m an actor in a movie

that could stop filming at any time.

And sure, I’m reading my lines

and following my script,

but the whole time I’m just thinking of my parents,

and wishing I could give them a call.”

Laura thinks the dog is her aunt’s property, not hers, which relates to her view of the temporary. Since she believes she owns nothing of this new life, these lines foreshadow her journey of immersion and adaptation.

“Sparrow makes me wish my aunt

was as easy to figure out,

with all her rules I never know are rules

until I break them without knowing how,

things that I do my very best to remember but,

I’m not perfect, you know?”

Humans and animals are compared in a strong analogy. Through Laura’s lens, animals are easier to interpret because they don’t hide behind indirectness. In contrast, Silvia causes tension for Laura because she can’t interpret her expectations and wants as she can with Sparrow.

“Children may not be allowed in Harmonic Way

(according to Janet),

but apparently therapy dogs and their owners

are.”

Laura’s intelligence leads her to this shifting moment when she finds hope. The plot increases in pacing because Laura has an important goal now: to train Sparrow as a therapy dog.

“Puppies mess up.

That’s a thing, right?

They’re like babies but with fur.

And maybe that’s why Titi never had kids”

Laura shows insightfulness through this critical thinking. Her perspective about Sparrow reveals that she’s attentive, noticing that puppies are similar to babies. She also correctly analyzes Silvia’s reasons for not having children.

“I mean, I can learn how to teach Sparrow

anything I could ever want to teach him,

without actually having to stare

at words for hours,

without actually having to read.”

Laura displays a pattern of resourcefulness by looking up videos, as she did with the rehab facility. This poem is also an example of metafiction and irony because readers are intaking a short novel in verse, not reading something lengthy, meaning the poems are similar to a short video compared to a movie (prose novel).

“And Sparrow can tell I’m distracted.

He loves being the center of attention,

so he’ll pull me everywhere if I’m not

present

and concentrated

and on my toes

but even though I usually like that,

like how Sparrow makes me think just about him

and not about all the other messed-up stuff”

Sparrow’s character traits of playfulness, high energy, and healing are key to Laura’s growth. He helps her get outside her head and focus on the present, which promotes healing.

“[H]ow it seems like people are always

always

just looking for an excuse

to get rid of anyone different,

anyone who is a you

not a me.”

These lines convey the “other” idea while emphasizing the theme of belonging. Laura and Benson are different, so others may reject them. The language of a “you” and not a “me,” addresses the social conflict of discrimination.

“[B]efore leaving to ‘go get a little pick-me-up,’

which freezes me in place before I remember

that this is Benson’s mom

and not my own.”

Laura compares Benson’s mom to her own because the term “pick-me-up” would be related to drugs for Laura’s mom. The comparison fills Laura with anxiety, a natural reaction to her traumatic past. The author inserts PTSD moments like this to authenticate Laura’s worries.

“DID YOU KNOW?

Google says cuddling with dogs

helps people feel better.

I learned that while looking up

what therapy dogs do.

And looking at Benson and Sparrow

and how happy Benson looks

makes my own mouth arch up

into a giant grin.”

Descriptions of Benson and Sparrow’s happiness show The Healing Power of Animals. Laura also feels happiness, a positive emotion she hasn’t felt in a while, which signifies a pivotal moment in her storyline.

“[B]ecause this is not a forever plan,

and I need to f-o-c-u-s

need to remember that Benson and Sparrow?

They are a tool. A path.

Everyone and everything is temporary.”

Repeating the word “temporary” is evidence for the motif. Laura obsesses over what is lasting versus what is not, an unhealthy thought spiral she must overcome to fully accept and enjoy her new life.

“Yeah, temporary best friends.

That’s what I meant.”

After Laura’s words, Benson’s dialogue turns the mood to sorrow and pain. Laura hurts Benson when she minimizes their friendship and this is the catalyst for their fight. The word temporary is used again to show the motif and contrasts with Benson’s view of their forever friendship.

“[B]ecause my aunt smiles at me

with that smile that almost looks like Mom’s,

that smile that sometimes makes me

forget to breathe,

tells me I really am a good kid,

and that if I want to look into training Sparrow,

she’ll support me,

she promises,

she’ll help us be the best we can be.”

Silvia shares her first moment of compassion, expressing love and support to Laura. Her character deepens as a guardian and mentor by offering any help she can to reach their goal.

“Why do you even care?

I say grumpily.

Normally you wouldn’t even be here

or you’d be asleep.

Like why is that okay when you do it

but if my parents do it

then all of a sudden they get locked up?

Titi Silvia goes still,

and then she tells me to come sit with her on the couch.”

This is one of Laura’s many scenes of lashing out at Silvia. While Laura takes out her frustration on Silvia, Silvia doesn’t retaliate. Instead, Silvia shows maturity and guides Laura to speak about her problems.

“I just can’t get over the fact

that she didn’t tell me about the meeting,

that she didn’t even want me at the meeting,

even though this isn’t about her at all—

it’s about MY parents and MY life.”

Laura’s pain is conveyed with the capitalization. She has the right to know about her own life and expects honesty from adults like Silvia, which all relates to the theme of control.

“[L]eaving him with Benson and walking away,

[…] Sparrow lets out the kind of howl

that I feel deep in my belly,

the kind of howl I want to sometimes

let out myself,

and I think maybe this is a skill

we both need some practice with,

this watching people say goodbye

and believing in them enough

to calmly stay.”

Sparrow and Laura are mirrored in their distrust and anxiety about being abandoned. They’ve both been left before, so separation triggers their negative reactions. Both the dog and girl cannot trust that others won’t leave them forever, a misbelief they change by the end.

“But it seems like I don’t just keep making

bad decisions, I also

keep making bad judgments,

hurting my aunt’s feelings

over and over again,

like I’m some sort of grumpy molting bird

so focused on my own stuff,

I can’t think about anyone else”

Laura is hard on herself, feeling guilty about every perceived “wrong.” Her character arc of renewal includes the realization that everyone makes mistakes and the ability to employ self-forgiveness. The symbol of birds is used again, here as a negative self-association.

“How long can you be away from somewhere

before your memory starts to fade?

How long do you have to live in a place

before it becomes your home?

How many dogs and people

and unpacked bags

does it take to make a family,

and can I have

more than one family

without giving anything up?”

The motif of questions occurs again here with profound inquiries. Laura’s thoughtful, questioning nature is part of The Search for Identity, so her curiosity to find answers to these complex ideas is striking.