Our Kids: The American Dream in Crisis

Silva is an emerging scholar in the field of inequality studies. Over the course of two years, Silva interviewed young adults and their parents from all over the country for this book.

Chelsea, an upper-class resident of Port Clinton, is profiled in Chapter 1. Her mother has a graduate degree and works part time; her father is a traveling sales manager. Her mother is a very involved parent; Chelsea worked on the high school yearbook, and her mother fought for Chelsea to get the yearbook scholarship when Chelsea wasn’t chosen for it. Chelsea is active in many other activities and always knew she would go to college. She plans to go to law school.

David, a lower-class resident of Port Clinton, is profiled in Chapter 1. His father was a high school dropout who did odd jobs and is now in prison for robbery. Because David’s parents are separated, he sometimes lived with his grandmother, and his dad was sometimes on drugs. David went to seven different elementary schools and did enough to pass each year but was sent to behavioral school for fighting. A teacher helped him transfer to a career-based intervention class in high school, and he earned a degree. He has difficulty securing a job because he is on probation and has a record. He still wants to go to college but does not know how he will get there. He shares custody of a daughter and has no savings.

Don, part of the Port Clinton Class of 1959, is profiled in Chapter 1. Don was a “soft-spoken white working-class kid” and first-generation college student (2). He grew up on the poor side of town, and his parents “didn’t have a clue” about college, but a minister at his church helped him “navigate the admissions process” (4). Don ended up becoming a minister and is married with one child, who became a school librarian.

Frank, part of the Port Clinton Class of 1959, is profiled in Chapter 1. He came from one of the few wealthy families in Port Clinton, with two college-educated parents who were active in the city’s social hub for the elite—the Port Clinton Yacht Club—but who “downplayed their social status” (5). Frank worked summers as a teenager, and most of his classmates did not realize he was wealthy. Frank always knew he’d go to college: He attended a small college in Ohio and graduated with a journalism degree, and then he enlisted in the Navy for seven years. He then worked for a newspaper and eventually the family businesses. He was helped along at times by a trust fund.

Libby, part of the Port Clinton Class of 1959, is profiled in Chapter 1. Her father was a farmer, and her mother was a housewife; both had a tenth-grade education. Libby was the sixth of 10 children. Her social life centered on school and church. Her parents had high expectations for her education. Libby went to college on a scholarship but dropped out to get married and start a family. After a divorce, she reinvented herself and eventually became a public official. She later became a part-time pastor. Overall, her gender held her back from upward mobility, but her social class did not.

Jesse and Cheryl are profiled in Chapter 1 and were the only two black students in Putnam’s Port Clinton Class of 1959. Jesse and Cheryl’s families fled the South; both sets of parents worked and had only elementary school educations. Jesse and Cheryl both excelled in high school, and Jesse was the president of the student council. After attending college and graduate school, they both achieved successful careers in education. Their interactions in town were mostly pleasant, but they still experienced racism, and there was not much socializing across racial lines outside of school and sports.

Andrew, an upper-class resident of Bend, is profiled in Chapter 2. His parents came from modest, middle-class backgrounds but became wealthy before Andrew was born. His father is a businessman, and his mother dropped out of college when she got married but eventually got her degree. Andrew’s parents have made education a priority: Andrew attended private school through eighth grade and started working at age 14. Though Andrew was a mediocre student, he put himself through college with part-time work and loans. He continues to be close to his parents.

Kayla, a lower-class resident of Bend, is profiled in Chapter 2. Kayla’s mother started working at Pizza Hut, and Kayla was the result of a casual relationship with her boss there. Kayla’s father had an alcoholic mother and a father who was in prison, so he grew up in a series of foster homes and dropped out of school after eighth grade to care for his mother. Kayla’s mother and father made an unstable, poor couple. When Kayla was born, they lived in a trailer, with her father working minimum-wage jobs. Kayla’s mother left the family for another man and ended up homeless. Kayla spent different periods of time living with either her mother or father and still has feelings of abandonment. Kayla was in a program for troubled adolescents at her high school, which has a high dropout rate. She received support at the high school in terms of college opportunities, but she and her boyfriend currently live on her father’s disability payments, along with him. She has no realistic goals and suffers from depression.

Desmond, profiled in Chapter 3, is a college graduate from Atlanta. He has two younger siblings and is part of an upper-middle-class black family living in a racially diverse suburb. His mother is a teacher who grew up middle class with parents who were married for over 50 years: a mother who was a medical secretary and a father who was a manager at Merrill Lynch. Desmond’s father was born in Suriname and raised by immigrant parents in New York who were close and religious. Desmond’s father went to “the worst high school in Brooklyn” (85) but was expected to go to college and did. 

Desmond’s mother became a stay-at-home mom when he was born, and his father became an IT manager for a major Wall Street firm. Desmond’s father would take Desmond and his siblings to work, and both parents emphasized education. They moved around to ensure that their kids would go to good schools, and their mother was involved in their schoolwork, volunteered at their school, and gave them supplemental work. Their dad encouraged them to read the newspaper. Their parents “consider conversation and listening to be tools for educating their kids” (87). They encourage their children to make their own decisions but can also be “tough and interventionist” (89). The family is religious and active in church activities. When Desmond developed diabetes, the whole family adapted to his way of eating. His parents taught him that he had to “work a little bit harder” because he is black (90).

Stephanie, Michelle, and Lauren are lower-class Atlanta residents who are profiled in Chapter 3. Michelle and Lauren have two older brothers and were raised in poor, black suburbs by a single mother, Stephanie, who works as an office manager. Stephanie grew up in Detroit; she had an abusive, alcoholic father, and her mother and stepfather were also alcoholics. Stephanie “fell in with a rough crowd from the projects” and became a gang member (93). She was often suspended and was punished for bad grades. Stephanie moved to Atlanta during high school, shortly after her mother died. She got her GED and became pregnant, but she also became more responsible once she had children. She was promoted to store manager and was earning a salary twice the poverty level in her area by the time she had four children. 

For the most part, Stephanie has supported her children on her own, and her children recognize how hard she has worked to provide for them. However, it is rare for the family to have dinner together or talk about their day. She’s moved the family to better neighborhoods as she could afford it. Lauren earned a degree at a local community college, but Michelle struggled in school and dropped out of college after one year. 

Elijah is profiled in Chapter 3. He was born in Germany, and his parents split up when he was around three or four years old. He was left with his paternal grandparents and grew up “largely unsupervised” in the “impoverished black ghettos of New Orleans and Atlanta” (83). Elijah’s grandfather beat him and abused Elijah’s grandmother. Elijah’s cousin James, who is now serving 25 to life for first-degree murder, got Elijah into robbery at age six or seven. Elijah fought with white kids at his school, and he grew up around murder and other violence. 

When Elijah was 10, he saw his father for the first time in years. His father was in prison and eventually became a street preacher in the south of Atlanta. Elijah moved to Atlanta at age 13 to help his mother care for her infant twins; this kept him out of trouble for a while, but then he went to juvenile detention for burning down a house when a woman called him a “negro.” His father got him out but beat him severely. His mother was also verbally abusive throughout his childhood, and he felt discouraged. He graduated from high school at age 19 but slipped into drugs and drinking. At age 21, he is packing groceries for a living but might want to become a preacher (like his father) or produce music. Elijah tries to keep his violent tendencies under control, goes to church, and tries to be a good person.

Clara, Ricardo, and Isabella are upper-class residents of Orange County who are profiled in Chapter 4. Clara was born and raised in Mexico, and her family immigrated legally, including her father, who was a railway worker. She grew up going to drug- and gang-ridden schools and living in poor neighborhoods, but her parents were supportive and modeled a strong work ethic. She did not grow up thinking she was poor, and her older siblings were “politically and culturally sophisticated” (140). She also received a lot of encouragement from her teachers. Clara went to college and graduate school on scholarships and is a social worker. 

She was a divorced single mom for years before meeting Ricardo, who became a successful architect and then a project manager at a nonprofit. Clara and Ricardo became successful professionals and moved to Fullerton in the 1990s to raise their three children, including Isabella and two boys. They are now part of the Orange County middle class in an integrated neighborhood where the Latinos in the neighborhood tend to be wealthier than whites. They chose the neighborhood specifically for its schools (including a public magnet high school that is in the top 50 high schools in America) and the nearby colleges. 

Clara was actively involved in the schools and worked only part-time while her children were in school. The high school their children attended (Troy High) is racially diverse but not socioeconomically. The school was highly competitive in terms of academics and even extracurricular activities. In their community, parents regularly donate to the schools. The school and community also focus heavily on SAT preparation. Clara and Ricardo’s oldest son went to an Ivy League school, but Isabella went to a local college because the family was worried about paying for college when the Great Recession hit.

Lola and Sofia are profiled in Chapter 4 and live in their step-grandfather’s house in the most dangerous part of Orange County: Santa Ana. Their relatively peaceful block is surrounded by drugs and gangs. Lola and Sofia’s grandmother and step-grandfather did not graduate from high school but gave the sisters a stable and loving home when the neighborhood was safer. They had regular family dinners, and the strict grandparents encouraged them to do well in school and have good manners. They weren’t affluent but “never ever went without anything” (151). 

Their grandmother died when Lola was 14 and Sofia was 6, and their step-grandfather moved out five years later, leaving them on their own. Lola had to attend Santa Ana High School and dropped out to care for her sister. Their birth fathers were both drug addicts, and their birth mother was one of the first female gang members in Santa Ana who later became a drug addict and prostitute; she was in prison for most of their lives and died when the sisters were young. Sofia does not know who her father is, and Lola’s father is a drug addict and gang member who lives in Fullerton. Ironically, they were not pressured to join a gang because of who their parents were, and they stayed away from drugs and alcohol because of their mother’s example. 

The sisters had good school experiences until Santa Ana High School, which was full of gang members with guns who threatened other students and were disrespectful to the teachers. School teachers and administrators were also uncaring; Sofia was mistakenly assigned to a Spanish-speaking class when she doesn’t speak Spanish, and the school wouldn’t let the sisters participate in extracurriculars they were interested in. Lola eventually got Sofia into a continuation school and community college, where Sofia is doing well and wants to be a teacher, but the sisters still have difficulty navigating the college system. Lola finished high school but never went to college and has a job that she hates.

Marnie, Eleanor, and Madeline are profiled in Chapter 5. Eleanor and Madeline have lived with their mother, Marnie, in Lower Merion Township in Philadelphia for most of their lives. Their parents stretched financially so that they could live in that area, which has a soccer club, community center, YMCA, active civic associations, and diverse religious institutions. The once-diverse neighborhood is now mostly upper-middle-class. Marnie is the daughter of a movie producer and was raised in Beverly Hills. She was a first-generation college student, and her parents were alcoholics who married and divorced each other three times. She went to Beverly Hills High, an Ivy League college, and Wharton for her master’s degree. Her husband Thad also has a graduate degree. After being a successful entrepreneur, his business failed, and they divorced. 

Marnie became an independent consultant so that she could support the family’s “extravagant lifestyle” (194). Eleanor and Madeline went to a private middle school and grew up with private lessons and other activities. Their parents’ divorce hit them hard, and their father does not live nearby. Their mother relied on household staff and others to help raise them. Eleanor went to boarding school for high school but left in 11th grade with severe depression and returned to public high school. Eleanor was diagnosed with ADHD, and her mother kept it confidential to avoid a stigma but rearranged their home life to help her. Marnie also arranged birth control for Madeline in eighth grade when she found out that Madeline might become sexually active. 

Both girls have close relationships with mentors at church and with their friends’ parents. They also had professional SAT tutors. Eleanor is now majoring in business at a major university, and Madeline is going to a prestigious Canadian university and eventually wants to go to Yale Law School. Marnie’s daughters benefited from their parents’ “weak ties”—casual acquaintances in various professions.