Our Kids: The American Dream in Crisis

“Lower class,” as used in this book, means that neither parent went beyond a high school education. These families are also sometimes described as “high school-educated” or “poor.”

“Middle class,” as used in this book, generally means that the parents had some college education but may not have graduated.

In a neo-traditional marriage, both partners work outside of the home and delay having children until they have stable careers.

Fragile families are those in which the parents’ relationship is unstable or nonexistent. Children in fragile families are often raised by a single parent, and there may also be step-parents and step-siblings.

Multi-partner fertility describes a characteristic of today’s blended families, in which there are several temporary father or mother figures and children who do not share the same parents. This is common among less-educated families today.

Contingent reciprocity describes the serve-and-return interactions adults may have with a child, such as when the child vocalizes and the adult vocalizes back, or the adult reads to the child and names objects and encourages the child to respond. This type of interaction has been shown to be essential for optimal learning.

Executive functions are brain-based “air traffic control activities” (110), like concentration, impulse control, mental flexibility, and working memory. These activities are concentrated in the prefrontal cortex. Deficiencies in these functions correlate with ADHD and learning disabilities. These functions usually develop rapidly between ages 3 and 5, unless a child experiences chronic stress during that period.

The Adverse Childhood Experiences Scale is a measurement tool developed by scientists to measure the incidence of events that can produce toxic stress. The events include: (1) a household adult humiliated or threatened you physically, (2) a household adult hit, slapped, or injured you, (3) an adult sexually abused you, (4) you felt that no one in the family loved or supported you, (5) your parents separated or divorced, (6) you lacked food or clothes or your parents were too drunk or high to care for you, (7) your mother or stepmother was physically abused, (8) you lived with an alcoholic or drug user, (9) a household member was depressed or suicidal, and (10) a household member was imprisoned.

Concerted cultivation consists of the “childrearing investments that middle-class parents deliberately make to foster their children’s cognitive, social, and cultural skills, and, in turn, to further their children’s success in life, particularly in school” (118).

Natural growth is an approach to parenting that “leaves the child’s development more to his or her own devices, with less scheduling and less engagement with schools” (118). Parents “rely more on rules and discipline, less on close parental monitoring, encouragement, reasoning, and negotiation” (118). This type of parenting is characteristic of poorer families.

Tracking is the practice of “separating students into college-prep and non-college prep tracks” (173). This does not appear to be as influential on future success as many believe.

Soft skills include “strong work habits, self-discipline, teamwork, leadership, and a sense of civic engagement” (174). These are often developed in school extracurricular activities. Having soft skills tends to correlate with success, but lower-class families now have less access to the activities that help children develop soft skills.