Double Fudge

In the gift shop, Fudge is delighted to find clothing, toys, and souvenirs covered in images of money and dollar signs. He begs his parents for a bag of shredded money so he can “try to glue it back together” and “buy every toy in the world” (74). As Fudge runs around the gift shop laughing with glee, Peter asks his parents if they still think bringing Fudge here was a good idea. On the contrary, Mr. and Mrs. Hatcher are disappointed that Fudge’s obsession with money seems stronger than ever.

As the Hatchers prepare to leave the gift shop, a man walks over to their group and introduces himself as Mr. Hatcher’s long-lost cousin, Howie. Howie is delighted to see his cousin again, whom he used to call “Tubby” because Mr. Hatcher was heavier as a child. Mr. Hatcher isn’t exactly pleased to see Howie because his cousin won’t stop calling him by this childhood nickname. Howie explains that he has been living in Hawaii for some time, and he introduces the Hatchers to the rest of his family: his wife, Eudora, and his twin daughters, Flora and Fauna, who are about Peter’s age and “named for the natural beauty of [the Hawaiian] islands” (79). Coincidentally, Howie and Eudora’s three-year-old son is also named Farley Drexel, which is apparently an old Hatcher family name. When Flora and Fauna realize that Fudge and their little brother share the same name, they decide they should copy his nickname and call their little brother Fudge as well. Fudge is enraged at the thought of his nickname being stolen, and Peter suggests calling the little boy “Mini,” as in “Mini-Fudge” or “Mini-Farley.” Mini doesn’t speak, but he pretends to be a wild animal and attacks Fudge, which causes a big scene in the gift shop. Moments later, Flora and Fauna break into a rehearsed song about how “The best things in life are free” (86), which horrifies Peter and draws even more attention to their group.

The New York Hatchers and the Hawaiian Hatchers gather at a nearby coffee shop to catch up. Howie offers to buy hot fudge sundaes for everyone in honor of their Uncle Farley Drexel, Fudge and Mini’s namesake. Howie is a park ranger, and after spending years in Hawaii, Howie and his family are moving to Florida so he can begin his new job at Everglades National Park. Howie is disappointed to learn that Mr. Hatcher works in advertising, and he accuses his cousin of “selling out” (90) and giving up his childhood dream of becoming a forest ranger. Howie has strong opinions about many things; his family doesn’t watch television or attend traditional school. Instead, Flora and Fauna are homeschooled, and Howie brags that the girls are performers known as “the Heavenly Hatchers” (93) in Hawaii. The girls again break into a performance in the coffee shop, much to Peter’s chagrin.

The next day, Howie invites Peter and Fudge to join his family on a VIP tour of the National Zoo. The boys become “official member[s] of the Panda Poop Club” (97) when they are introduced to the unusual smell and appearance of panda poop during the tour. Fudge declares that when he gets older, he will buy a panda as a pet and bring it to school to show all the other kids. Howie offers to drive the New York Hatchers to the train station, and along the way, they drive past the White House. Peter daydreams of what life would be like if his mom or dad were ever to become president, while Fudge informs Peter that one day, he’ll buy all of Washington, DC, and rename it Fudgington. Howie tells Mr. Hatcher that his family will be passing through New York in a few weeks, and he suggests staying with the New York Hatchers during their visit. Mr. and Mrs. Hatcher try to talk Howie out of it, but he assures them that they’ll “hardly know [they’re] there” (101), and Peter’s mother and father reluctantly agree to host them.