Crome Yellow

The house seems to be empty. Denis wanders from room to room, looking at the different styles of décor and thinking about how someone in the future would reconstruct life in Crome. He finds a volume of his own poems lying open on a table and wonders whether Anne, who was the inspiration for a poem about a woman in a tree, had been reading it. He thinks longingly about what a genius he was when he wrote the poems for this collection, which had been published six months ago.

Denis goes upstairs to the boudoir of his hostess, Priscilla Wimbush. He finds Priscilla lying on a sofa, holding a blotting pad and pen, and she tells Denis that she forgot he was coming to Crome. Priscilla is a masculine woman with a deep voice and massive coiffure. She asks Denis what he has been doing lately, and as he prepares to tell her about his life in London, she interrupts to tell him she has been looking at horoscopes. She reveals that she has been using astrology to place bets. Denis knows that Priscilla has had a gambling problem in the past, and her husband, Henry Wimbush, had to sell some of his most valuable pieces of art to cover Priscilla’s debts. Priscilla now spends all her time at Crome, “cultivating an ill-defined malady” and dabbling in mysticism and the occult, and Henry gives her a small allowance to bet on horse racing (6).

Priscilla says she does not miss her old life of parties, traveling, and going to the theater. She shows Denis a book by someone named Mr. Barbecue-Smith. Priscilla reads aloud a passage in which the author claims that material concerns are less important than spiritual ones. She tells Denis she has invited Barbecue-Smith to Crome the following weekend and starts to read a passage about a lotus pool, but she becomes distracted and instead tells Denis a story about letting the villagers use Crome’s swimming pool. The two go downstairs to see if tea is ready.

This chapter starts with a description of the terrace in front of Crome, which has a brick summer house at each end and an unusually sharp slope leading down to the swimming pool and the wooded park. Beyond the park lies the river and green, rolling hills. From below, Crome looks like an imposing, well-fortified castle.

Denis and Priscilla approach a tea table set up near one of the summer houses, where the rest of Crome’s visitors are gathered. Fifty-year-old Henry Wimbush has a serene, ageless face and graceful manners. Jenny Mullion sits near him but seems separate from the rest of the group; she is around 30, wears her hair in two buns, and has piercing eyes. She almost never communicates with anyone, and Denis does not know what she thinks about anything. Mary Bracegirdle sits on Henry’s other side; she is almost 23, wears her blond hair in a page cut, and has an earnest, naïve expression. Next to Mary is Mr. Scogan, an older man of small stature who has a beaked nose, weathered skin, and a thin, dry voice. Another guest is Gombauld, a confident, handsome 30-year-old painter of French descent. Denis is jealous of Gombauld’s looks and ease of manner. Between Gombauld and Mr. Scogan, Anne, Henry Wimbush’s niece, reclines on a lowered deck chair. She has light brown hair, blue eyes, and a quick laugh, but Denis notes her smile seems to contain an “infinity of slightly malicious amusement” that he cannot always understand (12).

Denis sits between Jenny and Gombauld. Anne asks Denis how London has been since she left, and Denis again prepares excitedly to tell his story about London. However, Henry interrupts him to tell the group about his latest archaeological find on the property: 50 yards of 15th-century oaken drainpipes. Mary asks Denis what he has been writing lately, and he tells her he has been writing both verse and prose, including a novel about “the usual things” (13). Mr. Scogan accurately guesses the exact plot of Denis’s novel: it is about a socially awkward but intellectually precocious boy who leaves his small town for London, lives among artists and philosophers, writes a brilliant novel, and ultimately disappears into a beautiful future. Humiliated, Denis says he is wrong, but secretly swears to tear up the chapters he has written. Mr. Scogan wonders when young men will stop writing novels about the spiritual struggles of adolescents and artists. Gombauld says he regrets being a boring subject for a novel, and Mary says she has known many fascinating artists. Mr. Scogan tells her she is a superior woman, and Mary blushes.

The next morning, Denis spends several minutes lying in bed, planning his outfit. After dressing, he scrutinizes himself in the mirror, noticing that his yellow hair has a greenish tinge to it and wishing that it were more golden. He goes downstairs to find that almost everyone has eaten breakfast and only Jenny is still at the table. They talk stiffly about recent thunderstorms in the area, and Denis imagines the two of them as “parallel straight lines” that never truly meet (15). He wonders if anyone really makes contact with anyone. Remembering what Mr. Scogan said to Mary the previous day, Denis asks Jenny if she considers herself a superior woman. Jenny says no and tells Denis that she finds Mr. Scogan sinister. When Denis tries to continue the conversation, Jenny responds only with smiles and nods.

Denis goes out to the terrace to read the morning paper. Anne comes out an hour later and tells him he looks “perfectly sweet” in his white trousers (16). Embarrassed, Denis tells her she sounds like she is speaking to a child. She tells him she thinks of him as a child because she is four years older than he is. Frustrated with the conversation, Denis suggests they go to the garden.

The garden, full of light and color, lies behind a high, thick wall. Denis holds the gate open for Anne and quotes a poem by 17th-century poet Andrew Marvell as they enter. Anne says that quoting literature is a bad habit and she is always embarrassed because she never understands the reference. Denis apologizes, saying it is a natural product of being educated, to which Anne says Denis may one day regret his education. She points out the magnificence of the sunflowers and Denis compares them to Ethiopian kings; he immediately apologizes for adding another literary element to the conversation, but Anne sits on a bench and expresses interest in hearing more. Denis explains that during the course of one’s education, one reads so many books that one loses touch with the world. He claims to have read “twenty or thirty tons” of books in the past five years (18). As he continues speaking, Anne watches him quietly and thinks that he looks particularly charming.

Denis says that too many people formulate a philosophy and try to fit their lives into it, while what they should do is live first and create a philosophy based on their experiences. Anne feels sorry for him, realizing he is tortured by existential questions, and asks him if he truly thinks about these things that seem to bring him so much suffering. She says Denis should live more simply and accept things as they happen rather than agonizing over them. Her life philosophy is to avoid painful things and embrace pleasurable ones. Denis, on the other hand, has to convince himself that any pleasure he feels is part of his journey to a higher plane of existence. However, he has recently recognized that this is a toxic way to move through the world.

Anne tells him that he needs a wife, a steady income, and a normal job. Denis desperately wants to say that what he needs is her, but he cannot get himself to say it. After a moment of silence, Anne leaves, saying she is going to take a bath.

Henry takes the visitors to see Crome’s farmyard. They look at a huge sow who has just given birth to 14 piglets. Henry tells them that the other sow’s litter was much smaller and that if this one does not have a bigger one next time, he will fatten her up for slaughter. Anne says this is indecent and cruel, but Mr. Scogan believes it is a model for the ideal government, which should get rid of people when they can no longer breed or work. Denis scratches a boar’s back with a walking stick and reflects on how much he enjoys doing this kind of small, good deed for a creature that appreciates it.

Rowley, the oldest and most experienced laborer on Crome’s farm, comes in and greets the group. He is tall and strong and has the dignified air of an elder statesman. Mr. Scogan admires what he perceives as Rowley’s wisdom and good judgment.

The group leaves the pigsties and walks around the rest of the farm. They stop to look at a massive bull standing in his enclosure. Henry says the bull is wonderful but might be getting too old to breed. Mr. Scogan suggests Henry fatten the bull up and slaughter him, and Anne says she wishes the animals could be given a break from constantly reproducing. Henry says he enjoys seeing many animals where before there was only one. Gombauld agrees, saying that everyone in the group should have lots of children and argues that sterility is unnatural and harmful.

Denis stands back, observing the makeup of the group. Mary prepares to refute Gombauld’s argument, but Mr. Scogan cuts her off. He claims that science has decoupled love from the act of reproduction and that in the future, families will no longer exist, people will be grown in incubators run by the state, and love will float freely. Anne says this sounds lovely, and Mr. Scogan agrees. An incredulous Mary asks him if he truly thinks people will be grown in bottles.

Mr. Barbecue-Smith arrives at Crome on Saturday. He sports a grayish-black mane of hair and is short and fat. While he was once upset by the fact that he has no neck, he now takes comfort in the belief that the head and heart should be as close together as possible. In his youth, he thought of himself as a bohemian, but now, he is a bestselling author and considers himself a teacher and prophet.

Priscilla shows him around Crome and introduces him to the group. Priscilla tells him that Denis is also a writer, and Mr. Barbecue-Smith asks Denis what he writes. Denis dislikes Barbecue-Smith’s patronizing tone and does not want to respond, but Anne interjects and says that Denis is a poet. Mr. Barbecue-Smith says poetry is a noble pursuit. After tea, Mr. Barbecue-Smith goes to his room to write.

When he comes down for dinner later that evening, Mr. Barbecue-Smith finds Denis playing piano in the drawing room. He asks Denis how many words he writes in an hour, claiming this is very important. Denis guesses he could write 1,200 words in four hours. Mr. Barbecue-Smith brags that he wrote 3,800 words in two and a half hours earlier that day. He tells Denis that the secret to writing is “Inspiration,” and he goes on to explain that he uses dissociative states rather than hard work to produce large amounts of good writing (26). He discovered this many years earlier, when he was a poor, struggling journalist. Overworked and exhausted, he looked at a bright light above his desk and became hypnotized; upon regaining consciousness, he realized that hours had passed and that he had spontaneously written 4,000 words. Denis assumes the writing must have been gibberish, but Mr. Barbecue-Smith says that aside from a few spelling mistakes, the writing was perfect. He tells Denis that the key is to get in touch with his subconscious, which will allow him to get in touch with the universe.

Denis asks whether the universe sometimes sends nonsensical messages, and Mr. Barbecue-Smith says that he simply concentrates to keep this from happening. Denis notes that Mr. Barbecue-Smith often seems to speak in quotations, possibly from his own books. Mr. Barbecue-Smith shows him some aphorisms he wrote on the train earlier that day, and Denis finds them impenetrable and repetitive. Before going to dinner, Mr. Barbecue-Smith reminds Denis not to tell anyone about his system of accessing “Inspiration.”